Why I Cried Through the Season Finale of Fleabag on Halloween

[This article is pure emotional response to the first season of Fleabag and will be difficult to discern if you haven’t watched it. If you have watched it… same applies.]

fleabag

Why I Cried Through the Season Finale of Fleabag on Halloween

  • Because Fleabag’s father never chose her over his second wife. Worse: alone with his daughter, he showed potential. Maybe that’s why he was afraid to be in the same room with her, by himself. Because he became human. If he could’ve been completely written off it would’ve been better. Instead it hurt worse.
  • His second wife is the worst. Hands down to Olivia Colman, you’re an all-star, but I hated you in this show. Nothing. I liked nothing. I felt no sympathy. Smash all the wine glasses, steal all the statues, and let loose the cats, I hated you.
  • Fleabag’s sister turned on her. As the season became increasingly about their relationship, especially after the retreat in episode four, my love bloomed and in episode five that great scene, where sis is going to leave her husband, go to Finland and pay for the café. It’s destroyed. All of that confident decision making, for happiness, and it’s over. And she throws Boo in Fleabag’s face and it’s so cruel because she knows it will hit and hurt and it never stops hurting anyway. Fleabag doesn’t need that. She needs her sister to trust her.
  • Boo. The scene where she puts on Fleabag’s coat, so Fleabag can yell at herself (was that the finale or the episode before? I watched both in a row). Fleabag’s actions… and she knows it. She’s destroyed by it, the guilt, but mostly the loss. Boo meant the world to her and in one self-destructive sweep that she doesn’t understand, doesn’t have to make sense, but will haunt her for the rest of her life. One, stupid, meaningless decision, with results that destroy. Mistakes.
  • The loneliness. It’s Fleabag and the guinea pig in the end, and as kind as the loan guy is, the sadness isn’t alleviated. It’s only a temporary reprieve. But she gets to keep the café. That’s important.

 

“That’s why they put rubbers on the end of pencils.”

 

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